Lyrically Sick

Apologies for the lack of blogging of late, I have been on holiday! I cunningly set my Interesting Medical Fact of the Week to automatically post on Monday, having written it last week, but don't be fooled. I spent the weekend at the Edinburgh Festival, which was amazing, and this week I'm at my boyfriend's house many miles away, so although technically I have had access to a computer, my impetus to blog has not really been there and also, nothing that exciting and medical has happened.

But no more! I have decided to get cracking on a post I intended to write some time ago, in which I will look at the lyrics of popular songs and attempt to diagnose the singer on the basis of the symptoms they describe experiencing when viewing their beloved.

Before you judge me, perhaps I should clarify that the song selection should in no way be held as representative of my own musical preferences and was chosen purely on the basis of medically interpretable lyrics. 

First up we have:

Olly Murs - Heart Skips A Beat - Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome

So come on, spin me around 
I don’t wanna go home 
Cause when you hold me like this 
You know my heart skips, skips a beat

Olly Murs describes experiencing ectopic beats, or the sensation of a skipped or missed heartbeat - not to be confused with ectopic beets, which is when a beetroot grows in your fallopian tube. This is a very common form of cardiac arryhthmia, and indeed is really nothing to be concerned about in a healthy adult.

However, Mr Murs indicates that his palpitations occur only when the object of his affection spins him around and holds him in a particular way. This could indicate that he is suffering from postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome, a condition in which the body struggles to deal with the changes in blood pressure occasioned by a change from a lying-down to an upright posture, or even by more minor changes in posture, and the heartrate increases dramatically as a result. Olly Murs may find his symptoms improved by increasing his fluid intake, taking regular exercise and wearing strong support tights.

Lady Gaga - Poker Face - Prosopagnosia

Can't read my, 
Can't read my,
No he can't read my poker face.

Ms Gaga reports that the apple of her eye is unable to read her poker face. Sad to say, he may well be suffering from a condition called prosopagnosia, also known as 'face blindness', in which the ability to recognise faces is affected. Sufferers may be unable to recognise even their own face, and are forced to rely on other qualities such as voice, gait, and clothing to tell people apart from one another. Ms Gaga would be able to help her friend to recognise her by, for example, picking a distinctive piece of clothing and always wearing it around him. Perhaps a hat made out of a telephone would suffice.

Katy Perry - E.T. - Capgras Delusion

Boy, you're an alien 
Your touch so foreign 
It's supernatural 
Extraterrestrial

In this song, Katy Perry appears to be under the impression that her significant other is from another planet. In this, it would seem likely that she is suffering from Capgras syndrome, in which the sufferer has the delusion that a close friend or relative has been replaced by an identical imposter. It may occur in cases of schizophrenia, dementia and brain injury, and it has been suggested that the Capgras delusion is in a sense the opposite of prosopagnosia, in that the person's ability to consciously recognise someone's face is intact, but they are lacking the unconscious emotional response to seeing the person's face.

Alas, that is all for now as I am totally out of inspiration. I may continue at some later date. Suggestions for songs/medical conditions greatly appreciated!

5 Things Healthy People Miss Out On

Over at Cushie Bloggers for the month of April, some bloggers took part in the Cushing's Awareness Challenge during April; the aim was to blog about something to do with Cushing's Disease every day of April. Well, I don't have Cushing's Disease, and it's now May. But the Challenge includes a list of prompts and suggestions of topics for bloggers with Cushing's disease to write about, and it looks like a good list to me for anyone with a pituitary adenoma to co-opt.

So, my first post from the list is in honour of both Cushing's Awareness and TSHoma Cognisance. And in fairness, I strongly suspect that awareness of thyroid-stimulating-hormone-producing pituitary adenomas is even lower than awareness of Cushing's Disease...

I like to think I am a fairly optimistic and sunny person, so instead of going down the depressing route, I have decided to start with a post focusing on the awesome aspects of being sick. Presenting:

5 THINGS HEALTHY PEOPLE MISS OUT ON

Or: Why It Is Great To Be Me and Be Ill 

1. You always have an excuse.

"Excuse me, madam, but you would appear to have inadvertently stabbed this man".
"Oh, I'm so sorry officer, it must be my brain tumour playing up again. Forgive me."
"Not at all, my good woman. Please continue about your business. And get well soon!"

In fact, I never have stabbed a man, but I fondly imagine that were I to do so, this is roughly how the conversation with the policeperson would go afterwards. Having a tumour in your head is rubbish, but it's one hell of an opportunity to get away with doing what you want.

Want a seat on the bus? Mention the tumour.
Late for a deadline? Mention the tumour.
Want to freak out a stranger? Mention the tumour.
In detail.

2. Improved and terrifying knowledge of medical terminology.

You know, if I didn't have a pituitary adenoma, I would never have heard of adrenocorticotrophic hormone, let alone be able to pronounce it. And now, not only do I have an expanded vocabulary for actual words, but I know the abbreviations too. I know that my form for TFT bloods will check my TSH, FT3 and FT4 - plus usually my endocrinologist requests SHBG and alpha subunit. Because that is just how he rolls.

3. A warm and fuzzy glow about UK taxation.

You know what I don't mind? When, at the end of the month, my paycheck is shrunk by several hundred pounds thanks to paying tax and National Insurance contributions. You know why I don't mind it? Because one monthly dose of lanreotide costs more than twice what I pay in tax. And that's not including the costs of my regular visits to the doctor, the nurse, the hospital, my other prescriptions, my MRI scans, my surgery, my blood tests.

I can't imagine how horrendous it would be to have to pay for this stuff in a country without a decent national healthcare system.

4. Joie De Vivre

It sounds pretty cheesy to say that being ill gives you a newfound appreciation for life. That's because it is a cheesy thing to say. However, it is also true. The feeling of achievement when, after pituitary surgery, you manage to very slowly walk the ten minutes to the nearest pub is as satisfying as learning to play the tuba. Probably more satisfying, in fact. After all, I've never met a happy tuba player.*

5. Writing this blog

I would never in a hundred years have managed to keep up writing a blog this long (since last August… that's ten months!) if I had not been ill. No matter what topic I picked, it would surely have lapsed, just like every other diary I've ever attempted to write has lapsed, usually within about a week. But writing so often has been really good for me; it's improved my style, it's made me more comfortable with just sitting down and typing - and searching for Interesting Medical Facts of the Week has taught me a hell of a lot. And being ill is what has made me keep this up. I can't ever lapse for long, because there's always going to be something I want to complain about.

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*Disclaimer: I have never met a tuba player.

Belated: Cushing's Disease Awareness Day

So it turns out that the 8th of April was Cushing's Disease Awareness Day, and I completely missed it. Not least because it was Easter Sunday, i.e. the first day I could eat chocolate again having given it up for Lent. It does seem cruelly ironic that the awareness day for a terrible disease, a key symptom of which is central obesity, should fall on a day that the rest of the world dedicates to filling their faces with fatty treats.*

Anyway, dedicated readers of my blog already know what Cushing's Disease is, but for everyone else: Cushing's Disease is caused by a tumour, known as an adenoma, on the pituitary gland. The tumour produces high levels of adrenocorticotropic hormone (ACTH) which can result in obesity, high sweating, hair loss, hypertension, diabetes, headaches, painful joints, and other not-so-fun symptoms. Treatment is chiefly through surgery and radiotherapy, as Cushing's is difficult to treat with medication.

There's a group of bloggers who suffer from Cushing's Disease who've been doing the "Cushing's Awareness Challenge", blogging on a different topic about their illness for every day of April. You can find out more about the challenge and read some of their blog posts by clicking here.

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*Well, I do anyway.

IMFW: The Burzinski Saga

Less an interesting medical fact today, more an interesting medical story. Are we sitting comfortably?

Then let's begin.

I was reading the Guardian today, as is my wont, and I came across this article about the interesting story of Rhys Morgan, a 17 year-old Welsh blogger. Rhys wrote a blog post about the Burzynski Clinic, a US cancer treatment centre. Keeping it brief, the Burzynski Clinic runs (non-randomised) clinical trials of a therapy for cancer, and it charges very sick people thousands of dollars for the privelege of taking part in these trials.

So far, so US healthcare.

But Morgan and other bloggers have pointed out that although these trials have been going on for decades, the National Cancer Institute website notes that no randomised controlled trials of Burzynski's treatment have been published, nor have other investigators been able to duplicate the results found by Dr Burzynski and his colleagues in earlier trials. The treatment is not approved by the FDA for the treatment or prevention of any disease, but people from the UK are raising hundreds of thousands of pounds to travel to the US to try this treatment, and these bloggers questioned that.

Unsurprisingly, the Burzynski Clinic repudiated these claims of unethical behaviour. For their trouble, Morgan and others were ineptly threatened with legal action by the Burzynski Clinic's former PR man (nice work), threats which they responded to in a dignified and thoughtful way. You can read Morgan's very interesting correspondence with the clinic here.